1.City Hall
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
All you people up there in City Hall
You're fuckin' it up for the people that's in the streets
This is a song for the people in the streets
Not the people City Hall
All you motherfuckers in the streets
It's time to rise up, up up up
Come along children and fuckin' rise
Lots of times when me and KG are watchin'
All the fuckin' shit that goes down at City Hall
We get the feeling we should fuck shit up
Yeah we should fuckin' start a riot, a riot
We have 'em screaming in the streets
We have 'em tippin' over shit
And breakin' fuckin' windows
Of small businesses
And settin' fuckin' fires
And settin' fuckin' fires
And settin' fuckin' fires
And then after the smoke is cleared
And the rubble has been swept away
Me and KG will peek out our heads
We've been watching the riots on a monitor twenty floors
Below sea level, from a bunker
We did it Rage-Kage, we beat the bastards of City Hall
But now what will we do？
We must rebuild
But who will lead us in the rebuilding process？
Man, it's got to be someone with the know-how
And the elbow grease to lead us to a new land
No, not me and KG
We don't have the cognitive capacity to lead
Alright, we'll do it
We'll lead as Two Kings
We'll lead as Two Kings
Ahh
(Two Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings)
Ah ha ah how
We'll lead as Two Kings
The first decree is to legalize marijuana
The tyranny and the bullshit's gone on too long
You old fuckin' shrivs who blocked it's legalization
You're banished from the land
We'll lead as Two Kings
We'll lead as Two Kings
Ahh
(Two Kings, we'll lead as Two Kings)
Ah ha ah how
Lead as Two Kings
The second decree, no more pollution
No more car exhaust or ocean dumpage
From now on, we will travel in tubes
We'll lead as Two Kings, oh yeah
We'll fuckin' lead as Two Kings
Get the scientists working
On the tube technology, immediately
(Tube technology)
Chop, chop, let's go
Third decree, no more rich people and poor people
From now on, we will all be the same umm, I dunno
I gotta think about that
We'll lead as Two Kings
Ah yeah, ah yeah
Ha ha ho hee, ha ha ho hee
Ha ha ho ho ho ho
Oh my God
Ahh, what？
Dude, the red phone is flashing
Oh, yeah
Let me scoop that up
Hello？ Two Kings
Who is it？
What？ No, no fucking way
What？
Rage, there's a potato famine in Idaho
You gotta go down there
Oh my God, what？
Dude, I gotta stay here
Why do I have to go？
Please! Please!
Oh, God, okay
Awesome, is he gone？
Alright, emergency meeting of Parliament
All right Parliament, I know this is fucked up
But Rage, he can't be King anymore
Dudes, he's encroaching on my decrees
Seriously, let's make him
'Duke' a kick ass 'Duke'
Or, 'Leader formerly known as King'
But uh oh, he's comin' back
We'll lead as Two Kings, oh yes
We'll really lead as Two Kings
Uh, dude？
Rage
I went all over Idaho
Yeah？
Uh, plenty of potatoes everywhere
What？ There was no famine？
Yeah, there was no famine, no
Dude
I don't know what's uh
A toast
A toast
Long live the, 'D'
Long live the, 'D'
Long live me
I'm sorry, I poisoned your wine
What？
For the good of the land
You p, I poisoned yours
Huh heh, as well
No, no
City, city, city, city, city, city, shitty
Shitty, city, shitty, shitty, city, city, shitty
Hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall, hall
People inside me are askin' me to smoke up City Hall
'Cause no one here is talkin'
People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall
'Cause no one here is rockin'
People inside me are askin' me to blow up City Hall
'Cause everyone is rock-'em, sock-'em robots
Everyone is rock-'em, sock-'em robots
Everyone is rock-'em, sock-'em go oh
Don't, cut that part out
We've got it
Um, do you believe in God？
I believe, I believe
You do？
I believe in God
I believe in God
Y'do
I believe in God
Do you？
I believe in God
Yeah, but you didn't fuckin' come out with this
(One)
(Cuts off on, 'One')
I got some lyrics
Malibu nights, tangerine dreams
Malibu neighs, Malibu dreams
Malibu, makin' a poo
Stinky poo, lookin'd view
Because it's time for my breakfast
It's time for some cheese
It's time for the stink
Time for the breeze
Time for the hah-or-ee
2.Dio
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Dio has rocked for a long, long time
Now it's time for him to pass the torch
He has songs of Wilder Beasts and dangers
He has soared on the wings of a demon
It's time to pass the torch
You're too old to rock, no more rockin' for you
We're takin' you to a home
But we will sing a song about you
And we will make sure
That you're very well taken care of
You'll tell us secrets
That you've learned
Your sauce will mix with ours
And we'll make a good goulash baby
Dio, time to go, you must give your cape and scepter to me
And a smaller one for K G, go, go, Dio, Dio
3.Double Team
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Damn, a hard day's rockin'
Better slip off ma shoes
Maybe give a little stretch, and a bend
Dip m'toe to jacuzzi, baby
Slip out this book, 'The Buttress of Windsor'
Ho ho ho, who's this？ How's it goin'？
That's the first thin' I say to you
How's it goin'？ Are you flowin'？
Listen, honey, thinkin' 'bout a couple things to say to you
Showin', growin'
Man, I'd like to place my hand
Upon your fuckin' sexy ass and squeeze and squeeze
Take off your blouse
And your underpants
Then take a look
'Cause here me an' KG come naked
Out of the side hatch
With the oils and perfume and incense
Now you're groovin', put on a cool '70s groove
A funky groove to fuck to, a funky groove to fuck to
Me, me and KG, it's all about sex supreme
We likes to cream jeans
Have you ever been worked on
By two guys who are hot for your snatch？
That's what I'm offerin' you
You step into our room
And then you smell of perfume
You lay upon our roundish bed
And then you feel a tickling on your head
It's KG with the feather and the French tickler
Look out, baby, he got the tools
And then you feel somethin' down by your feet
It's me, it's JB, I'm suckin' upon your toes
We don't mind suckin' on toes
Good luck findin' a boyfriend who sucks toe
Havin' sex with me and KG
Now you're talkin' double team supreme
Let's roll
What？ Yeah, huh, nah
Ah, that's it, that's right
Oh, my gah, oh, I think I'm gonna, oh
Deht! Deht! Eeee! Splooge
That was the one
'Hail Satan'
'Hail Satan'
'Hail Satan'
'Hail Satan'
4.Explosivo
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Climb upon my faithful steed
Then we gonna ride
Gonna smoke some weed
Climb upon my big ass steed
And ride, ride, ride
What's the name of the song？
Explosivo
Don't know what it's about
But it's good to go
What's the name of my girlfriend？
I don't know
But she's built like the shit
And she's good to go, go
She's good to go
She's good to go
We are fueled by Satan
Yes we're schooled by Satan
Fueled by Satan
Writin' those tasty riffs
Just as fast as we can
Schooled by Satan
We were the inventors
Of the cosmic astral code
We've come to blow you away
We've come to blow your nose
We've come to fuckin' blow
We've come to blow the show
We've come to fuckin' blow
You know it, you know it
What's the name of the song？
Explosivo
Don't know what it's about
But it's good to riddle
I am not one of you
I come from an ancient time
I am known as the Kicker of Elves
I am also known as the Angel Crusher
Explosivo
5.Friendship
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Friendship is rare
Do you know what I'm sayin' to you？
Friendship is rare
My Derriere when you find out much later
That they don't really care
It's rare to me, can't you see？
It's rare to me, can't you see？
Oh shit there's a bear
Could you hand me that shotgun buddy, also that chair？
We're fighting a bear
Now your life's in grave danger
And you don't even care
It's rare to me, can't you see？
It's rare to me, can't you see？
It's rare to me, say a prayer for me
'Cause it's rare to be in Tenacious D
Friends will be friends they're running naked in the sand
Friends holding hands will someday surely form a band
Friends will be friends they say that friends are friends to the
bitter end
Long as there's a record deal we'll always be friends
Long as there's a record deal we'll always be friends
Friends will be friends they're running naked in the sand
Friends holding hands will someday surely form a band
Friends will be friends they say that friends are friends to the
bitter end
Long as there's a record deal we'll always be friends
Long as there's a record deal we'll always be friends, yeah
6.Fuck Her Gently
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
This is a song for the ladies
But fellas listen closely
You don't always have to fuck her hard
In fact sometimes that's not right to do
Sometimes you've got to make some love
And fuckin' give her some smoochies too
Sometimes you got to squeeze
Sometimes you got to say, 'Please'
Sometimes you got to say
'Hey I'm gonna fuck you, softly
I'm gonna screw you gently
I'm gonna hump you, sweetly
I'm gonna ball you discretely'
And then you say, 'Hey I brought you flowers'
And then you say, 'Wait a minute Sally
I think I got somethin' in my teeth, could you get it out for
me？'
That's fuckin' team work
What's your favorite posish？
That's cool with me, it's not my favorite but I'll do it for you
What's your favorite dish？
I'm not gonna cook it but I'll order it from Zanzibar
And then I'm gonna love you completely
And then I fuckin' fuck you discretely
And then I fuckin' bone you completely
But then I'm gonna fuck you hard
Hard
7.Karate
Lyricist：Pedro Rymer-ludwig
With karate I'll kick your ass
Here to Tiananmen Square
Oh yeah, muthafucka
I'm gonna kick your fuckin' derriere
You broke the rules
Now I'll pull out all your pubic hair
You muthafucka
You muthafucka
Kyle betrayed me
And then he lied tried to hide
And I died deep inside
And you know the reason why
I'm gonna kick your ass
From here to right over there
Oh yeah, muthafucka
I'm gonna kick your fuckin' derriere
You broke the rules
Now I'll pull out all your pubic hair
You muthafucka
You muthafucka
8.Kielbasa
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Dude, we gotta fuckin' write something new, c'mon
I don't like that, so far bad, off to a bad start
Better, closer, warmer, that's it, okay
I love ya baby but all I can think about is
Kielbasa sausage, your butt cheeks is warm
I check my dipstick, you need lubrication, honey
My kielbasa sausage has just got to perform
Now get it on!
I see you walkin', but all I can think about is
Dianetics, your butt cheeks is warm
I check my dipstick, you need lubrication, honey
My kielbasa sausage has just got to perform
Now I've been set loose-ah, I'm shooting my juice-ah
Right in your caboose, now fuckin' get it on!
Now get it on, get it on!
Dianetics Jr. much better than Krishna
Dianetics Jr. much better indeed
And all you people here you're tremendous
Except the people in the back
And you're smokin' up a big-ass bowl of weed
With me, me and KG
All right! Oh yeah! All right! Oh my God!
All the ladies in the house say yeah, yeah
C'mon, you muthafucka say a prayer
When ya fight, ya gotta fight fair
You muthafucka, ho, you muthafucka
You know what time it is？
It's a Tenacious D time, you muthafucka, go!
Fuck, yeah! Yeah, yeah!
Dude, that was TNT
9.Kyle Quit the Band
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Last week, Kyle quit the band
Now we're back together, uh
Misunderstanding, didn't understand
It doesn't matter, now we're back together again
Uh la la la la la
Couldn't split up Kato and Nash
That's true
Couldn't split up Tango and Cash
That's also true
This is our song of exultant joy because
We only came to kick some ass
Rock the fuckin' house and kick some ass
What we gonna do with all the cash？
Smoke hash, and then we thrash
We'll throw a big ol' bash, y'all
And everyone is invited to the bash
And everyone, you're all invited to the bash
C'mon Kyle, watch out, c'mon
10.Lee
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee
Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee
We're talkin' fuckin' Lee
I had a friend named Lee
He cast a spell a spell on me
If me and Lee and KG could be three
Flyin' free Tenaciously
Skinny-dippin' in a sea of Lee
I'd propose on bended knee
To Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee Lee
Lee Lee
Lee Lee Lee, Lee Lee Lee
Lee Lee
Le-Lut-Le-Le-Le-Lee Lee Lee
Le-Lut-Le-Le-Le-Lee Lee
If me, and Lee, and KG
(That's me)
Could be three
(Could be three)
Plant a tree
(Plant a tree)
Just for Lee
(Just for Lee)
Just for Lee
(Lee)
Just for Lee
Lee, Lee, Lee
Lee, Lee, Lee
Lee
11.Rock Your Socks Off
It doesn't matter if it is good,
It only matters if it rocks.
The main thing that we do is to rock your socks off.
There's no such thing as a rock prodigy,
'Cause rock 'n roll is bogus, right KG？ (right!)
Only thing that really matters is a classical sauce.
And that's why me and KG are classically trained
To rock your fuckin' socks off!
Give 'em a taste KG.
That is Bach and it rocks
It's a rock block of Bach
That he learned in the school
Called the school of hard knocks!
Give it up for KG, give it up for me,
Give it up for KG, give it up for me,
Give it up for rock,
Give it up for blues,
Give it up for everything that is not to lose.
Now rock your socks off woman,
We'll rock your shit up y'all.
Give it up children now to freak your shit out!
All right!
Now I know what a lot of you are sayin'：
'I just figured out what I'm 'onna do with the rest of my days.
I'm 'onna get me an oversized guitar, gain forty pounds and be
the next D.
' Well I got sour news for you, jack. It ain't that easy.
For instance, are you willing to make the commitment to wakin'
up
at the crack a' noon, for deep-knee rock squats!？
Seven or eight at a time!？ In a row？
How 'bout are you willing to make the commitment
to rock-hard tasty abs washer-board style？
Glistening in the sun. How 'bout are you willin' to make the
commitment,
wakin' up, goin' okay, it's gig time, what t-shirt am I gonna
wear？
Can't decide： Can't decide： Brain aneurysm!
We've been through so much bullshit just to be here tonight
to rock your fuckin' socks off. And all we ask in return is so
precious little.
All we're askin' you to do is drop trou and squeeze out
a Cleveland Steamer on my chest.
2-3-4,
Give it up for KG, give it up for me,
Give it up for KG, give it up for me,
Give it up for rock, give it up for blues,
Give it up for everything that is not to lose.
Now rock your socks off woman,
We'll rock your shit up y'all.
Give it up children won't you freak your shit out!
All right!
12.The Road
Lyricist：Harold Arlen, Johnny Mercer
The road is fuckin' hard
The road is fuckin' tough
There's no question that
It is rough and stuff
It's the fuckin' road my friend
But it's the only road I know
When I'm lunchin' on a tasty boosh
Right after the show
You g-go, go go
The road is fuckin' hard
It's also really fuckin' tough
There's no question that
It don't take no guff
The road is a be-a-itch my friend
But it's the only fuckin' road I know
When I'm snackin' on a tasty boosh
Right after the show
You g-go, go go
I met a tasty baby in Michigan
We screwed two times then I left
Sometimes I think of my baby in Michigan
Why can't I stay in one place
For more than two days
Why？
Because I'm talkin' about the road
Because I'm talkin' about the road
Because I'm talkin' about the road
Because I'm talkin' about the road
Because I'm talkin' about the road
Road
13.Tribute
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
This is the greatest and best song in the world
Tribute
Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here
We was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road
All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon in the middle of the
road
And he said
'Play the best song in the world or I'll eat your soul'
Well, me and Kyle, we looked at each other
And we each said, 'Okay'
And we played the first thing that came to our heads
Just so happened to be
The best song in the world
It was the best song in the world
Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
One and one make two, two and one make three
It was destiny
Once every hundred-thousand years or so
When the Sun doth shine and the moon doth glow
And the grass doth grow
Needless to say, the beast was stunned
Whip-crack went his schwumpy tail
And the beast was done
He asked us, 'Be you angels？'
And we said, 'Nay, we are but men'
Rock
This is not the greatest song in the world, no
This is just a tribute
Couldn't remember the greatest song in the world, no, no
This is a tribute, oh, to the greatest song in the world
All right, it was the greatest song in the world,
All right, it was the best muthafuckin' song the greatest song
in the world
Oh Mama Lucifer
And the peculiar thing is this my friends
The song we sang on that fateful night it didn't actually sound
Anything like this song
This is just a tribute, you gotta believe me
And I wish you were there, just a matter of opinion
Ah, fuck, good God, God lovin'
So surprised to find you can't stop it
All right, all right
14.Wonderboy
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
High above the mucky-muck, castle made of clouds
There sits Wonderboy, sitting oh so proudly
Not much to say when you're high above the mucky-muck
Yeah, yeah
Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power？
Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man？
Now it's time for me to tell you about Young Nastyman
Archrival and nemesis of Wonderboy
With powers comparable to Wonderboy
What powers you ask？ I dunno how 'bout the power of flight？
That do anything for ya？ That's levitation, Holmes
How 'bout the power to kill a yak from 200 yards away
With mind bullets, that's telekinesis, Kyle
How 'bout the power to move you？
History of Wonderboy and Young Nastyman
Riggah goo goo, riggah goo goo
A secret to be told, a gold chest to be bold,
And blasting forth with three-part harmony, yeow!
Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power？
Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man？
Well, Wonderboy and Young Nastyman joined forces
They formed a band the likes of which have never been seen
And they called themselves Tenacious D
That's right
Me, and KG, that's me, we're now Tenacious D
Come fly with me, fly
Wonderboy, what is the secret of your power？
Wonderboy, won't you take me far away from the mucky-muck man
Oh, take my hand Young Nastyman, and we'll fly
Bring out your broadsword, there's the hydra
Slice his throat, and grab his scroat
You take the high road, I'll take the low
There, the crevasse, fill it with your mighty juice
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